What I wish I’d known about being a Stay-at-Home-Mom

This September I begin my third year sending my kids off to school as I head to work. It was both scary and liberating to enter the work force again, to receive a paycheck (be it ever so small), to feel officially and legally employed after years of working hard for free.

I don’t really miss being home with young kids all day, but I do miss that season of life. And like so many seasons, I feel like I was just really learning how to survive Stay-At-Home-Mom-hood as I left it behind.

Here are 4 things I wished I’d known about being a Stay-at-Home-Mom (or at least learned more quickly, and remembered more readily): Read more

The Call of Jesus: Come to Me and Learn REST

“Come to Me, (JESUS SAYS) all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11)

I have always understood this invitation “come to Me and I will give you rest” by itself, as if Jesus is saying “Come to me, TAKE A NAP. I’ll do everything else.” And Jesus has done it ALL. All our spiritual needs are met in Him. The search is over. When we find Jesus, we’ve found God. And there’s nothing wrong with a good nap.

But a spiritual nap is not what Jesus is promising here. Because to find the promised REST, we have to “take His yoke upon us and learn from Him”. Read more

The Call of Jesus: Come to Me and Learn to be a Daughter or Son

“Come to Me, (JESUS SAYS) all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

We step into Matthew’s story as Jesus is addressing the crowds. Earlier in Matthew 11, Jesus received messengers from His cousin John the Baptist, in prison and wondering if Jesus is indeed the Messiah (spoiler alert: He is).

Then Jesus denounces the cities where He performed miracles because they saw Him and did not recognize Him.

Those near Jesus, who saw Him perform miraculous healing did not all believe and respond to Him.

So Jesus breaks into prayer:

“I praise You, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and intelligent and have revealed them to infants.  Yes, Father, for this way was well-pleasing in Your sight.  All things have been handed over to Me by My Father; and no one knows the Son except the Father; nor does anyone know the Father except the Son, and anyone to whom the Son wills to reveal Him.

The wise and intelligent (religious leaders) couldn’t receive the things of God in the package of Jesus. Here in Matthew, Jesus is saying, “If you can’t see who Father is in Me, then you can’t see the Father.”

When Jesus talks about knowing His Father, He’s not talking about book learning, a life of studying about the Father.

He learned what His Father was like the way every child understands her parents: not by studying books , but by living His life with Him. Jesus learned what His Father was like by listening for his voice, and learning from him.

A son learns to be like his father by living in His father’s house, by growing up with him.

So as the Son, the One who best knows the Father’s heart, Jesus makes this invitation:

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

Jesus is inviting us to come and learn. And the first thing we learn from Jesus is SONSHIP. This is the yoke of Jesus, the yoke of Sonship, of a dearly beloved child.

If I’m not functioning as one dearly beloved of the Father, then I’m not functioning out of the yoke of Jesus.

If our view of the Father doesn’t match up with the love demonstrated by Jesus, who said, “If you’ve seen me, you’ve seen the Father”? Then we’re not functioning out of the yoke of Jesus.

I learned and am still learning to lay down the old yoke, my old ways of being OK in the world. And I am learning (slowly, day by day) to come to Jesus and let Him teach me the way of sonship, the way of the Beloved of the Father. I am learning to be a daughter. The way of the Beloved.

This is the way of rest. And it is good.

Come to Me and Learn to be a daughter quote (1)

Over the next few weeks, I’m sharing my own lessons and thoughts from a Bible study I wrote with my friend Stacey and did with a group of (amazing) women last Fall. This 8 week study, The Call of Jesus, is available for free here or by clicking the “Free Bible Studies and Resources” link in my blog header. If you’re looking for a Bible study to do yourself or with friends this Fall, check it out!

The Call of Jesus: Come to Me and LEARN a New Way

Growing up my value system was unknowingly ruled by 3 main things, 3 ways I managed life in order to know that I was OK.

Reputation. I was a hard worker, not for the sake of achievement or because I valued excellence really, but because I valued being thought well of. I was driven by reputation.

Relationship.  I felt good about myself because of who my friends were. And I was a good and caring friend – sometimes at the expense of my own needs, and in spite of my better judgment. I was a good and caring friend so that people would like me. Because I needed them to be my friend, I needed them to like me, I needed to be needed.

Responsibility. As the oldest child in a split and blended family, I felt responsible for everyone. I was aware that the younger ones were watching, that I was expected to be a good influence. I was always aware of my responsibility. I didn’t realize it at the time, but now I see: I thought I could overcome the hurt and pain and unpredictability in our family for myself, my siblings, even my parents, by the power of my own responsibility and reliability. W

This was my value system, my way of managing life and being OK: Reputation, Relationship and Responsibility (and I was much better at being responsible for others than I was for myself.) That is how I was OK in the world.

Then, halfway through college, I met Jesus. I fell head over heels in love with Him. He filled up empty spaces I didn’t even know I had.

For years, this is how I shared my story: Before Jesus, I found safety, security, LIFE in relationships & reputation. But then I met Jesus and learned to find safety, security, life in Him.

I had been a Christian and telling this story for over 10 years before I realized it was a lie. Read more

The Call of Jesus: Come to Me and find REST

“Come to Me, (JESUS SAYS) all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11)

I have always understood this invitation “come to Me and I will give you rest” by itself, as if Jesus is saying “Come to me, TAKE A NAP. I’ll do everything else.” And Jesus has done it ALL. All our spiritual needs are met in Him. The search is over. When we find Jesus, we’ve found God. And there’s nothing wrong with a good nap.

But a spiritual nap is not what Jesus is promising here. Because to find the promised REST, we have to “take His yoke upon us and learn from Him”. Read more

The Call of Jesus: Come to Me and learn Sonship

Growing up, my value system was unknowingly ruled by 3 main things, 3 ways I managed life in order to know that I was OK.

Achievement. I was a hard worker, not for the sake of hard work or because I valued excellence really, but because I valued being thought well of. I was driven by reputation.

Relationship.  I felt good about myself because of who my friends were. And I was a good and caring friend – sometimes at the expense of my own needs, and in spite of my better judgment. I was a good and caring friend so that people would like me. Because I needed them to be my friend, I needed them to like me.

Responsibility. As the oldest child in a broken home, I felt responsible for others, aware that the younger ones were watching, that I was expected to be a good influence. I was always aware of my responsibility. I didn’t realize it at the time, but now I see that I thought I could overcome the hurt and pain and unpredictability in our family for myself and my siblings, by the power of my own responsibility and reliability. When I went off to college and left this role, predictably I went a little wild.

This was my value system, my way of managing life and being OK: Reputation, Relationship and Responsibility (and I was much better at being responsible for others than I was for myself.) That is how I was OK in the world.

Then, halfway through college, I met Jesus. I fell head over heels in love with Him, He filled up empty spaces I didn’t even know I had.

For years, this is how I shared my story: Before Jesus, I found safety, security, LIFE in relationships & reputation. But then I met Jesus and learned to find safety, security, life in Him.

I had been a Christian and telling this story for over 10 years before I realized it was a lie. Read more